This is Anya's intense look.

The behavioral battles have begun. This means that my girls understand way more than I thought they did. This also means that I need to be aware of everything I do. Every pickle given to Rachel first is seen by Anya, every nighty kiss to one is seen by the other, every front seat stroller ride is a slight. It is like I have two boyfriends, but they know about each other. There is no sneaking around, it is all out in the open and someone is always unhappy. Since Rachel is more agressive in her love for mama, it is often Anya that gets left out. I didn't know anything about this at all, of course, until this week when Anya decided to tell me about it.

She did this in the only way she knew how. It involved a 30 minute tantrum whose main goal was to make sure Rachel didn't have a bottle and Anya got two. Of course, I did what any mom would do, I just introduced a third baba into the mix. Nope, Anya's goal was to have all the babas and for Rachel to have none.

It makes me sad. It is not fair for two ladies to only have one mama. My sister and I are 3 years apart and I remember hating her when I was like 5. She was 2 and so so cute, she had totally ruined my life. It must be even worse to have an identical you getting mama's attention. Of course, I love my sister now, but I am pretty sure I wasn't the best sister to her until we were adults. But, now we make each other laugh until we cry.

Each time I see someone steal a toy and then bite someone else or push someone to the ground on the way to being picked up my mommy, I think about how the "twin bound" that some people talk about is just a myth.Or perhaps it takes all these experiences of sharing resources to develop this bound. Like cell mates in jail or something. :)

So my job as twin mama has gone from not only making sure they feel loved and entertained and accepted, but that they get all of these things equally.

OK, some girls are trying to feed me some grubby crackers. Must make sure I eat one from each now.

Happy Thanksgiving.