Sometimes I think about the girls' organs. About how I made them and grew them. I haven't thought about this in a long time. Not since I was still making them and growing them. I remember thinking early on in pregnancy, are their organs done yet? I remember how happy I was when I knew that they were indeed done and the girls just needed to grow from then on.

Rachel has some trouble breathing at night, so she sleeps in her car seat on the bed between us. I think it is mostly congestion because of her cold, but I worry it might be more. Perhaps she is allergic to Archie? I don;t know. She woke me up in the middle of the night, coughing a little. I held her close to me until she settled back to sleep. Then I dreamt that I travelled in through her white terry cloth pajamas into her lungs. And there I was, looking around at my finished product's insides. It was a comforting dream. Not at all gross like it sounds.

Anya laughed in her sleep at about 4 this morning. I wonder what she was dreaming of. I reached over to see if she would hold my finger and she did. And I feel back to sleep, dreaming again of terry cloth pajamas. But this time, I got to wear some. I also dreamt of boy twins. Adults. Sandy-haired and thin. They were fighting in a super hero-y way. Then one jumped from a window and parachuted onto me. This is my fear of getting pregnant with twins again.

I am thinking of organs again. And about how I can make them. I can't wait to toss that one at a girl when she is 7 and being a pain and hating mom for some silly injustice. "I made your organs! Be good!"